


Boxing

by redwoodroots



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: boxing lesson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-04-05 05:13:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19041847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redwoodroots/pseuds/redwoodroots
Summary: After refusing to defeat the multibear, Dipper asks Stan for some boxing lessons.  Stan agrees because watching a scrawny nerd run around is hilarious...until the multibear himself shows up!





	Boxing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [InvaderNamek12](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InvaderNamek12/gifts).



> PREPARE FOR A FICLET OF NERD SWEAT, CRUSTY STAN, AND BEAR HEADS!

Dipper landed chin-first in the dirt as Stan practically danced away, laughing. 

“No fair, you moved!” 

“You wanna box, kid, you gotta think like a boxer. Too slow!” 

Stan dodged again as Dipper came up swinging. He had to admit, the kid had some moxy. 

Dipper actually started to chase him around the lawn of the Mystery Shack, tiny kitten-size fists clenched around the tape. After he'd come back complaining about Pituitaur or whatever, he'd asked Stan for some boxing lessons. Stan had agreed because he thought it'd be fun to mess with Dipper. He never expected it to be _this_ funny!

“Hold – still!” Dipper gasped, wheezing. “You're – a fat old guy – you shouldn't – run that fast!” 

“I'm not, you're just an asthmatic nerdbot!” 

Dipper tried to reply and keeled over instead, grasping at his chest. 

Instantly the smile fell off Stan's face. “Kid? You alive?” He stepped closer and reached down. 

Next thing he knew he was stumbling back and holding his jaw. 

“How's _that_ for too slow?!” Dipper crowed. “Also ow ow OW that hurt!”

Stan snorted. “Not bad, kid. Maybe we can steal you some real boxing gloves next time we're in town.”

“Boxing gloves? I have a pair, if you think they'd fit.” 

They turned around and Stan froze. 

Stepping out of the trees was a massive bear eight feet tall and practically covered in heads. It was like a horrible nightmarish cross between a grizzly and Octavia. 

“What, what, plah,” Stan sputtered. 

The bear sniffed. “Are you some sort of tiny manotaur? You fairly reek of sweat, unwashed socks and...toxic waste?”

“No, that's just his usual funk,” Dipper said, walking over all calm like having a mutant bear show up was 100% normal. (Well, it was _here_ , but how the heck did Dipper know this thing anyway??).

“See, Grunkle Stan?” Dipper said. “Told you there was supernatural stuff here!” 

Stan rolled his eyes. “Kid, I think we both hit each other harder on the head than you thought.” 

Dipper opened his mouth to reply, but the big bear head started talking and Dipper turned to answer. 

Stan was thinking fast. There was some weird stuff here that Stan definitely didn't want the niblings caught up in. But if the multibear was the only thing Dipper had found so far, then it was probably fine. The bear was pretty harmless, the two of them were getting along, and anyway if Dipper insisted on saying the bear was supernatural, Stan could explain it away with the toxic waste runoff by the Sprouts' farm. Actually, he should probably take the gremlins over there just to head off any questions Dipper might have about it. Plus Mabel'd probably like the three-tailed lamb or whatever. 

Dipper and the multibear were still talking, and his grephew turned to look at him. 

“Would that be okay?”

“Huh?”

“If I went and grabbed the gloves real quick. I could, I don't know, stuff 'em with newspaper if they're too big?” He puffed out his scrawny chest. “I mean, I figure I'll grow into 'em, right?”

Stan looked at him for a second, then burst out laughing. 

“Hey!” 

“Sure, whatever,” he said, turning away and waving his hand. “Go follow Grizzly over there into the forest like a Disney princess. That'll make you _manly._ ”

“He's not a grizzly bear, he's a multibear!” 

“Right. Kid, I think we just hit each other in the head a few too many times. I'm headin in for a soda, hit me up for a rematch when you get back.”

“MAYBE I WILL!” 

The kitchen door swung shut behind him. Stan watched them leave from the window, Dipper clearly complaining to the multibear. 

Stan wasn't too worried. He'd seen the multibear around a couple of times through the years, usually hiding away in the forest and dancing to some weird girly music. Kinda reminded him of Dipper, now that he thought about it. No wonder the two got along so well. 

He turned away from the window and grabbed a soda off the table. Eh, the multibear was nothing dangerous, and anyway he was kinda hoping the kid would come back with an oversized pair of boxing gloves. He imagine Dipper weaving around trying to handle mittens the size of his own head. 

He grinned. He'd definitely have to get that on film, he'd make a fortune!


End file.
